This has been a painfully long week, and it's not over yet. I've still got another day of tests, sweat and tears.
Apparently I have a HOJ test tomorrow on a load of stuff we've been half-heartedly been covering. As long as there aren't too many dates on the test I'll probably get at least a B. Therefore, I don't feel the need to pour effort into studying. I feel like I've said this before, but I think the way I'm learning Japanese history is stupid. It's not as long of a history as China's, but there's still a lot to learn. Japan's history is not just samurai and World War II. Rawr.
Then there has been dancing/teching all week, which is extremely draining. I'm not dancing that much in the show, but in a way it feels like I dance the whole thing. I have no idea why. At this point, I think dance is more mentally exhausting than anything else. Sure, it's physically tiring, but the worst part is just getting myself onstage again and focusing. Dancers here aren't the most sincere people, which is weird to deal with again after hanging out with only techies for the past couple of weeks. There's only one way I know how to deal with people who are clearly judging and laughing behind your back- stay silent. There's no way to critise someone for being quiet and dancing relatively cleanly.
Middle School Choreography is quite possibly one of the worst experiences of my dance life so far. No matter how much I dislike dealing with fake dancers, MS girls worse. Save a few exceptions, they are lazy, disobedient, and don't pay attention. I remember when I was in MS, no matter how annoying I was, I had immense respect for high schoolers. I looked up to them, and obeyed them. If they told me to shut up, I did. Now, I'm sure these girls look up to one of the 4 choreographers (though probably not me, I yell at them too much), but they don't show it. Instead of having a nice afternoon without dance or tech on Friday, I have to go to a tech rehearsal for MS. This is clearly just screwing with all the dancers who are in the HS dance show. Some idiot told me that working with the MS girls would be rewarding. In reality, it's just something else to drain me of energy. And patience. And sanity.
“Believe in angels? Then believe in vampires. Believe in me. There are worse things on earth.” - Anna Rice