The Eve of Eighteen

In less than three hours by the time I post this blog, I will be eighteen years old. Isn't that crazy? I started this blog as a scared fifteen year old getting ready to enter sophomore year of high school. Now I sit, a lazy senior, waiting to take two more AP exams before I can avoid anything "College Board" related again. In less than three hours I can vote. I can drink (here in Singapore, that is). I can be tried in court as an adult. Big things, that all happen in less than three hours.

At the moment though, I must admit that I've been terribly distracted by none other than the menace that lives above me in this apartment. There's obviously a child in the bedroom above me, for I can hear it screaming and seemingly jump on the bed. It's very annoying. What is worse is that I hear yelling at various times during the day. Sometimes I can hear individual words. Currently I hear a tantrum. It makes me want to tear my hair out.

So even though I'm about to become an adult, I still get annoyed by very childish things. Perhaps that's the beauty of the phase known as "young adulthood"...

I suppose I'll know for sure when I'm older.

At least I'll see Nick tomorrow! He flew in this morning, and I am extremely excited.

Best Eats According to Natalie

When I was walking home from the MRT with a bubble tea cup in hand, I started thinking about all the wonderful food in Singapore- and how I'll have to say goodbye to it all in about two months! That made me very sad, but this list will not. Here's my list of favourite places to eat (and what I get)!

Food:

Roti Prata: My school does decent roti prata, but there's a Muslim food stall in Newton that makes prata that's sort of like cake. Super thick, chewy, and the curry is awesome!
Chicken Rice: Boon Tong Key is awesome. I find that mall hawkers are good, but the stuff that's $3 or less and comes wrapped in paper beats it every time.
Laksa: The stall in ION is pretty good. I only eat this once in a while.
Chili Crab: Jumbo's is good. So is No Signboard Seafood. Also, Long Beach.
TWG: It has surprisingly good food, though pricy. The smoked salmon and lamb is notable.
Ban Mee: It's soup. It's heavenly. Also, it's super filling.
Chicken Congee: I get this at chicken rice places sometimes. I have no idea why people think salty rice porridge with chicken and oil floating on top is weird. It's wonderful.
"Veggie"-- I'm pretty certain this stuff is bok choy. Who cares when it has oyster sauce on it?
Chicken wings: BBQ'd and greasy, best eaten outside.
Kuay Teow: Thick noodles, lots of bean sprouts and mysterious green veggie, and chicken. Mr. Ho's at school is such a guilty pleasure.
Char siew noodles: Chinese prepared pork, these funky elastic-y noodles, and mystery sauce of tasty.



Snacks:
Old Chang Kee-- Curry-O (curry puff with chicken, egg and potato)
BreadTalk: The cheesy sausage bun is so bad for you, but so good. Also Black Pearl when they have it.
To be honest, I don't normally eat savoury snacks.


Sweets:
Macaroons: TWG has pretty good tea themed ones, but you can get tasty ones throughout the island if you don't mind paying like $2.50 each.
Kue things: Not sure what the real name for these are, but they are funny jelly things that are normally brightly coloured. Often found at fruit stands.
Mochi Sweets: Strawberry, peach, and green tea mochi with cream inside!
Pulot Hitam: Black rice soup with condensed milk and sometimes ice cream. Maybe an acquired taste. My aunt said it looked like drowned ants, but its really good.

Frozen Treats:
Bread Ice Cream: Find along Orchard Road for $1. Slice of ice cream in a piece of rainbow bread
Ice Kachang: Local thing with lots of colour and various Asian goodies. The aunties at Great World City sometimes give me extra condensed milk on mine
Frozen Yogurt: Great World City has like 3 frozen yogurt places. I like the self-serve one or Yoguru the best.
Gelatissimo: YUM. Expensive as heck, but wow.


Drinks:
Gong Cha-- Regular bubble tea, Lemon Calpis
ShareTea-- Strawberry Ice Tea. Unnatural colour, but yummy!
Each-a-Cup: Milk tea ice-blended, basically any ice blended (kinda like a slushy)
Toast Box: Teh and Kopi (tea and coffee with condensed milk)
Sjora: Passion fruit flavoured drink. I get it when I go to Yoshinoya sometimes.
TWG: Fancy teas in a pretty pot. I like "dancing tea" and "princess tea"
Lime Juice: Find anywhere. Different than American lime juice. Its cousin calamansi juice is also wonderful.

Coming to a Close

It is crazy to think that I started this blog over three years ago. I was a very different person then than the one I am now-- I hope. This blog is an amazing time capsule for me of my thoughts, opinions, and observations about living here in Singapore.

My senior year is coming to a close, and my time in Singapore will be ending shortly afterwards. What will happen to this blog? I suppose I will leave it up, since there are some valuable points on here. Where will I write next? backtoboston2018.blogspot.com, of course. But what will I write about? Will I have more direction in my blog? Will I have ads? Will it be more food based? Student life based? It's hard to say now, but I think the answers will eventually become clear.

I wrote a letter to a great mentor of mine today, and I found it one of the easiest and most difficult letters I have ever sat down and written. It was easy because I knew exactly what I wanted to say: you taught me, and changed me, and I want to be like you. But to write such things would be silly. One cannot just blurt out everything all at once. To craft a letter elegant enough that I would be proud to have her read it, and honest enough for her to understand her impact on me... that was a difficult balance.

I mention this today because I feel I owe Singapore something for teaching me so much. Living here has taught me how to live in a city, even if it's a very safe one. It has taught me about other cultures, and how to truly respect them. It has taught me more about what it means to be Chinese, and I in turn have tried to figure out exactly how Chinese I want to be. Singapore will always been the place I spent my high school years, trying to find out exactly who I want to be.

Race, and Why I Don't Care

I just read an article that there were anti-semitic games and graffiti present in the town where I grew up. While most of the incidents appear to have happened in November, elementary schoolchildren were playing games like "Jail the Jews" and accusing the Jewish of killing Jesus Christ. My old town was not some backwards place full of ignorant trash- it is actually quite diverse and multicultural. Most of the students graduate high school, and that vast majority of them go to college (or junior college). I am sad to say that even in my childhood home, I cannot be surprised that there was racism there even amongst the young children. I remember subtle tensions between different races as we all halfheartedly learned about each other's winter holidays, all certain that our own was the best. I remember how one black kid got bused to Boston when he couldn't remember what bus he went on, and he lived in town. His mother was furious of course, but most of the other families who heard about the case rallied with the school: since most black children lived in the city, there was a good chance that this particular black Kindergartener did too.  Racism is everywhere, and it's easy to forget that if one doesn't have to think about it.

Here's the thing: I ultimately don't care what people are. Sure, I have my stereotypes and prejudices like everyone else, and I'm not afraid to admit it. However, race does not define a person's actions. Beating someone up is not "so ghetto" or "so black", while being super smart doesn't make people "so Asian". Yeah, most of the kids on the math team are Asian, while most of the sports kids are white. Race makes a difference in who you turn out to be, and there's not point in lying about that anymore. .  I evaluate others based on their comportment and decisions,  and I will remember you for your achievements or failures, not the colour of your skin. If you are nice to me, I will remember that. If you are a jerk, it doesn't matter what race you are, you're a jerk. I've been bullied by Jews and Christians alike, but I hate neither of them. I've fallen in love with a Buddhist, but I've known some pretty mean Buddhists too. One's race and religion does not immediately make someone good or bad- how they choose to live their lives does.

I've talked about this issue before, but nothing fails to disappoint me more than hearing that people cannot see people for who they are, rather than the package they come in.

High School is Dramatic

I am pretty horrible about posting these days. I've just been horribly busy with this nonsense called high school, which is an mix of the biggest-waste-of-time, the mildly-entertaining-but-really-stupid, and the actual-learning-experience. I feel like since I've become a second semester senior the only thing I'm motivated to do is pass.

Dance is also keeping me busy, but part of me doesn't enjoy it as much as I used to. I know taking a break from it isn't necessarily the answer- and I'm totally tied up until after the show. Choreography is exhausting and teaching is less rewarding than everyone makes it out to be. Hopefully at the end of the day everything will look lovely, but until then, it drags.

It's prom season again, the third one for me, and the last. It's fun to listen to who is going to ask who, how, when, where... etc. I'm pretty certain I'm going, and I have an idea for who may ask me as a friend. Not certain about after-prom, since I'm underage and really do not know anyone in my grade. Maybe a movie after prom would be fun. It's not a necessity to get wasted on prom night, after all.   We'll see how that works out. Buying a dress is going to be fun, especially since I plan on going with friends again this year. I've never worn a red dress... hmm!

Sitting around in the library waiting for my rehearsal to start, something occurred to me. High school is an extremely artificial environment, and attending high school in Singapore is a little like existing in a bubble in an aquarium. The things I care about now I know I won't be caring about in the future. I'm tired now, but I know I will be more tired later as a proper adult. Maybe this is what all those fancy psychologists are talking about when they say, "delayed adulthood and extended adolescence". I honestly have no idea why people enjoy being high schoolers, except that everything is basically taken care of. I can only fall so far or rise so high, after all. Everything stays suspended in the air, hanging, waiting to drop.

Also, why the heck don't students here use this library? It's massive, beautiful, and has loads of books. It's right depressing to be from the first generation that really does not read. As we lose the beauty of literature in favour of Buzzfeed and Twitter, we lose a complexity of thought. I hope there are always English majors, even if they can't get jobs, because at least they will know how valuable it is to expand one's mind and read.

Gamer Girl?

I've recently gotten a lot more into video games, and I partially blame Interim for introducing me to nerdy gamer friends. One friend plays Magic the Gathering, while another got us both into playing Hearthstone and DOTA (well, me, DOTA). I played Diablo III a lot two summers ago, and even though I'm rusty, I did not suck at the game. I actually played a Wizard and a Monk, and anyone who's interested can ask me about my build and why I chose it. I did not chose the wizard because she was pretty- I picked her because she was super cool. Yes, I started playing because my boyfriend talked me into it, but I also played independently enough to say that I was not playing solely for him. 

Magic the Gathering is fun because the game is very customisable. You can basically play any way you would like, and there are so many cards that you can always improve. However, it's a really expensive hobby since Booster Packs are $4 each and you end up buying a lot of them. Both my MTG friend and I are missing land cards, which is basically how you get the power to play anything. Sort of like wanting to bake a cake, but not having enough flour. It's possible to play, but it can be really miserable. 

I'm just getting into DOTA, and am not sure if I like it yet. The learning curve is horrible and the game is very time consuming. However, it is also a lot of fun because there are so many different ways to play. We'll see. 

Here's the thing about being a girl gamer, which I sort of consider myself to be. If no one knows you are a girl, you're fine. People won't judge you, or laugh at every mistake you make. Rather, they just call you a newbie, chuckle, and move on. However, if you declare that you are female, or it comes up, suddenly every mistake is because you are female. Every victory was somehow easier because the game is nerfed for girls or something, and guys online do not hesitate to assume that you are ugly. Not really sure why this is, but it's annoying. Everyone has internet names that they use to identify themselves. I've changed mine from very feminine to slightly-less-feminine, not because I dislike the name I was using, but because I don't want to have to deal with people knowing my gender up front. This is just silly.  

I'm honestly the only girl I know who plays MTG and Hearthstone. I do know at least one other girl who tried Diablo III just because it was so popular, but that's cool. However, I haven't tried  DOTA enough to say that I play it, so I'm not sure about the gender specs over there. 

It's weird how every now and then, women are reminded that we are supposed to be the fairer sex. We aren't supposed to do male things like play video games, and we get heckled for it when we violate the "dude zone". Boys, grow up please! Women have every right to play what you all play, because they want to!

People Are Rude

 I thought it was one of the most basic rules of social conduct. You do not speak of a party/event unless you know for a fact that everyone you are taking to is attending said event. That's why you don't let children give out birthday party invitations at school, since they are probably not giving invites to everyone. This is the second time this has happened with the same group of people in a relatively short time frame, and it's getting annoying. Did none of their parents ever bother to teach them this rule, or do they just not abide by it? I do not know either way, but people, please sort out your behaviour!

Apparently after-grad has been planned already, and people are already putting down deposits to go. I thought the concept of after-grad was that the whole class goes and parties for one last night together. This perception was wrong, because I only just heard about the event. Maybe it's only for people who party regularly? In which case, I do not understand why so many underclassmen are able to attend.